Friday, February 26, 2010

{Jax in double digits}



My youngest babe is 10 today.
Born 10+ pounds
Today, 100+ pounds
My love for him infinite.
Time has devoured the numbers.
I remember the day I held him for the first time. 
I told him without words, that I would be his momma and he will be my baby. 
I couldn't begin to imagine, what the process of mothering Jax would be. With the greatness and the hard times, he has taught me the meaning of conviction, inner superman strength, commitment, perseverance and laughter.
Only Jax could be my sensei.
Only my Jax.......

We've come a long way baby!

(when I see this picture, I just want to suck on his cheeks and rub baby lotion all over his rolls....I miss that)

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

{Dream a little dream}




I had a dream about Heidi Klum last night.
She was ahead of me in line at ShopKo.
She had a punk hair cut.
Kind of similar to Pink's.....shaved up the back and long jagged bangs in front.....platinum with black/purple accents.
She was so rockin'.
Nobody noticed that it was her!!!!!!
I kept looking around wondering if I was going crazy.
Am I the ONLY person seeing Heidi Klum in ShopKo!!!
Then I see her lil chillins running around, begging for candy.
One looked JUST like Seal and my heart started to excite!!!
I tapped Heidi on the shoulder, she turned to me and we were eye to eye, even though she had on 4" stilettos.
I say, "Heidi? Are you Heidi?"
In her German accent, she says, "Well who else would I be sweetheart?"
I turned into a thick-tongued fool!
My words were spilling ridiculously from my nervous mouth.
"Oh Heidi!!  I just LOVE you!!!  You are so beautiful, you seem so carefree and fun, how do you keep such an amazing body after kids?  Is Seal really that good in bed?  Me and my friend Paula watch Project Runway EVERY week! (a flat out lie!!!!  Paula religiously watches it, but I've only seen a few episodes.  I was nervous that she was going to ask me detailed questions of what I know about the show, so I diverted her attention) Oh, look over there!  Is that your new fragrance on sale at the ShopKo?  She walked over and grabbed an armful of her perfume and out of nowhere, had designer kick-ass clothes in front of us.  She took a sharpie that I happened to be carrying in my purse, and signed the merchandise.  She said I could keep it all as long as I didn't try to sell it on ebay to make a buck.
I promised that I wouldn't sell them, and that I would be wearing the clothes to my upcoming Bon Jovi concert.
She asked me to tell Jon hello and give him a peck on the cheek for her.  She would be calling him soon to give him a heads up that we would need backstage passes!!!!
 I kept saying, "Paula is just going to freak out!!!!!" 
Heidi responded with, "Well you and Paula should come up to my house and have cocktails." 
"You live in Utah??" I ask.  "Yah, 11 months out of the year.....but don't tell anyone!" she said. 
We exchanged phone numbers, she signed my forearm so that I could tattoo her name in the exact spot, gave me a model "wink", and cat-walked out the automatic doors with her babes in tow.

I woke up believing I would be up close and personal with Seal and having girlfriend talk with Heidi.  I couldn't wait to let Paula know!
After wiping the sleepers from my eyes, I realized it was just a beautiful dream :)

Heidi Klum.........another of my
"Wish upon a movie star!"

Monday, February 22, 2010


{Merci Papa}


Friday was our long awaited La Caille night.
Refreshing your memory:
My dad is the luckiest son-of-a-biscuit when it comes to winning things.
I, being the luckiest daughter of a son-of-a-biscuit, reap the rewards.
In August, dad volunteered at a Boys and Girls Club golf event.
He won the "La Caille" package.
$200 food certificate and a
nights stay at the cottage ($375).
Yes, we had a $600 night!
And Ohhhhhh, was it a night!
Thanks Dad!




The buildings and it's immaculate grounds are French fairytale-ish.
I was hoping to see my good buddy Johnny Depp drinkin' his wine and having a ciggy on the patio.


I wasn't aware that they have their own very, very small vineyard.
This wine cellar wrapped around the insides of this winding stair case (below)


Randy had brought a beautiful basket with fresh wild flowers, KamaSutra bath package, a bottle of amazing 'DaVinci' wine, and a heartfelt lovey, dovey card :)
The label on the wine bottle was simply gorgeous.



We each had an appetizer.
Randy: Baked onion soup $14
Jolie: Vegetable Napoleon $16
(stacked vegs with a rosemary cream sauce)
A complimentary sample of duck wrapped around vinegar cucumbers
~~~~~~
Salad
Randy:  Apple Walnut
Jolie:  Wilted Spinach
included with meal
~~~~~~~
Entree
Randy:  Cambridge Beef Shortribs  $49
Jolie:  Poulet Picatta Pomodoro  $49
(pounded chicken with capers and sundried tomatoes)
~~~~~~~
Dessert
Trio of La Caille Desserts
A Miniature Sampling:
Creme Brulee, Chocolate Chantilly Cake, & Beignet Francais  $16
~~~~~~~
After dinner coffee   $20/each
Randy:  Irish Coffee 
Jolie:  Can't remember....I was already drunk...
I DO know that it was good :)
 
Total bill: $208 plus a $40 tip.
And we brought our own wine!
(I am assuming you were wondering the expense of the famous "La Caille")

The Barista made the coffee drinks at our table.
Randy's glass had large sugar crystals and cinnamon baked around the entire goblet.
He added the whiskey and threw a flame for an
"ohhhh and ahhhhh" show.



We were totally love drunk!!!!!
~Awe~
and a little wine drunk!!!!!
~mmmm~
and a little whiskey drunk!!!!!
~ohhhh~

The restrooms were very pampering too.
Lotion, body spray, Q-tips, sewing kit, matches, feminine products, hair spray and breath mints were available for use.
BUT
This tacky "wall of fame" was what you have to endure upon leaving the crapper.
Apparently it's a head/boobie shot of the waiter staff.
This was beyond cheesy to me....I would have expected it in a Red Lobster or even one of those steak houses that they all line dance to an outdated country song, but surely NOT at a $250/couple fancy shmancy joint.
Look at the bosoms crying to escape from the God-awful velvet surrounding.
Very unclassy.
(cuz dammit! I knows me some class!)

Moving on now..............

~The Cottage~


There is a small pond near by full of swans and geese.
The cottage has it's own private drive.
There is only one cottage on the premises.
It is secluded by large pines.




As we enter through the red door, we notice that candles are lit, soft music playing, fire lit, a stocked fridge with beer, water, juices, and sodas....a fruit and cheese basket....and a bottle of La Caille wine.




The hot tub was just out the bathroom door.
They supply big, white, fluffy robes and slippers.
YEEHAW!!!!
Drink more beer, fireplace, and.......well, lots of nakee T.M.I!!!
Hey!!!! It was our 2nd honeymoon!
We took advantage of it all!


Room service brought our breakfast in the morning.
I know!!!!!
It was so awesome!
See the little rose butter buds?



We took our last hours sitting on the porch, drinking coffee and enjoying the sound of the fat black bunnies scampering through the trees.

Randy and I miss our cottage.
I doubt I will splurge on the food again, but I would love to stay at the cottage for our next anniversary.
It is encompassing happiness, love, pampering, sex, laughter, relaxation, indulgence, and re-uniting you and your partner in every way.
I'm still glowing.

Merci Papa!
{free!!!free!!!!free!!!!}


Free samples at this website.
I'm curious to see if they really work!

{Paula, Sue, Fro, and Fool}




For Paula's birthday, we went to the Gateway and ate at Z-Tejas.
I just love the Gateway.
It makes me feel like I'm in a bigger more sophisticated city than Salt Lake.
The food was wonderful and the bloody mary's are to die for!





From dinner, we met up with friends at
"A bar named Sue"
It lives up to it's fun name with barrels as tables, countless beers on tap, and live bands.
(Derek & Lisa, Paula & Jay D., Mike and Amie.....yes, I have two sets of friends named Mike and Amie....weird huh?)



The lovleeeee ladaes!!!!!!
Amie, Lisa, Paula, Noelle, Shine face, and Erica.


Derek popped in his famous "floating head".


This band, who's name was never known, dresses in polyester, chains, platforms and fro's.
Damn!!!!  They had us shakin' what our momma's gave us.
Good wholesome drunk fun!!!!


A birthday cheer for Paula.
Liquid dance courage for me :)
God I love this bar!!!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 The next segment, is a story of a drunkin' fool that was able to get to that one little agitated nerve of the big man.


This boy found interest in my scarf.
He was drunk.
He was a bit obnoxious.
He didn't know that Randy was going to kill him.



Randy had told him numerous times to take off my scarf and leave.
Randy was the only person bothered by the fool.  The rest of the group were using his foolishness to get a laugh.  Derek kept talking to him and Randy continued to get fired up.
See the look Randy is giving Derek.....like, "Dude! Don't encourage the ass to stay!"
Randy was pretty uptight about the fool to begin with, then the lil man put his arm around me.....
ahhhhh hell!!!!!!
Some kind of caveman protection, going postal, testosterone filled blood, scalping instinct arose.



This is Randy telling the fool,
"Get your arm away from my wife, take off her scarf, and get the {bleep, bleep} out of here before I beat your ass!"

WOW!!!  I've never seen Randy like this.
I was sad that he let the lil fool ruin his time with our great friends......
AND this fool-boy was totally not worth the effort!!! 
I'm sure that you can see that for your self.
But ya know, it kinda felt good that Randy stood up and pissed on his territory*.
It's nice to know your man gives a shit.
*(now that I think about it, that would mean Randy is pissing on me?!?!?!?)

Sunday, February 21, 2010


{The homeboyz' cribs}


Remember my cluster yuck picture????
We were able to move everything back to it's place.
My hall and office seem so big now.



Riv LOVES his room.


He has worked very hard to earn a tv in his room.
We still have rules that include the tv remaining off until the weekends.
River feels like he is a teenager now with this new kind of trust from us.



Jax's room turned out better than I had imagined.  We went with more of a sage color that feels very clean and calming.
We hired Randy's cousin who has a painting business to do the dastardly deed. 
Poor Cody!  I had him changing the colors more than once!!! 
I've lost my touch with decorating.
Can you even believe????
I must have some kind of color blinding tumor growing hairs that cloud my eyesight.
It's very frustrating.
I appreciate that Cody is such a laid back, cool dude!!!


Now.....on to the bathrooms,
then the family room,
then the kitchen,
then........ah hell!
Once you start this stuff, you can NEVER stop!!!

Saturday, February 20, 2010

{Blond girl trapped inside my boy}


On our way home from Paula's house Jax asks,
"Does Paula's mom have any kids?"

Friday, February 19, 2010


{What father knows best}


Randy took charge of assisting Riv with the science fair experiment.
They studied what Randy knows best.......
Oil and gears
A grease monkey knows his 15/40 vs. 50 weights.


They started by taking the hyphadooofalater and dripped the congadonk into the orfacale.*



Then spinned lacko-crand around until it made dripadingo a goldenspad color and thickapoo consistancy.*



The completion was set forth with verbage fingerlinked onto wooden rolled spindles of ivory parchment with inkblent on the surfacenuendo.*


And displayed among other infantile homosapians.*


The male ego was found to be puffed with chest and an ancient neanderthal sound coming from their testosterone pride.*

~~~~~~~~~

*My explanation of science.
I will leave the true facts to the Riv-man to explain.

Riv was pissed when he got home yesterday........he was beat out of going to district by a boy that proved the right elements for fog.
(River is extremely competitive)
Again.....WE'RE #2!!!  WE'RE #2!!!
Good lessons for River :) :(